An Open Letter to the Fashion Industry and Media

beauty-comes-in-all-shapes

I know what the title says and it’s true, this is my open letter to them – AND – to YOU. Yes you. That short and stout, the big and tall, the svelte and short, tall and svelte, the big breasted or too small to count (at least to those ignorant to think so) lad and lassie. I know your pains, for I have felt them too. I know friends and family who could even sympathize with you.

It sucks when you feel singled out in a world that caters to a supposed “Average”. You go to the store when it is time to find new shoes or clothes, but either something is too long, such as the sleeves or pant-legs even. Maybe it is the ‘bust’ on that beautiful blouse that’s in size “XS” but the bust you’d swear is “32C” instead of perhaps a “32A” like you feel it should be.

We cry, “It’s not fair! It’s not right!” because we shouldn’t be made to feel like we are anything ‘less’ for choosing to be who we are – or want to be. Whether that is aesthetics or personality. We also know people will say, “Well the world isn’t fair, don’t you know that!” and you know what? I think that’s a load of rubbish. I believe the world could be fair if it wanted to be, maybe even if perhaps we believed it to be. It’s just other negative people around us who keep perpetuating this negative notion that there is no “Fairness” in the world.

You have every right to feel angry and upset that you often feel singled out by the Fashion Industry and/or the Media. Even give them the “Ol’bird”. It’s really all their fault anyway. They find what they consider, “The Average” and make clothing to cater to it. Then it’s “One size fits most” and you know – you aren’t “most“. Your body is as unique as your personality, and you know that for a fact.

What’s also not fair, is for people who tend to run on the “Skinny” or “Svelte” side of things, they make our clothes based off run-way models whom many have been bullied into changing their figures or getting plastic surgery to fit the Fashion and Media’s idea of what “beautiful” is in the first place.

Maybe you were even told to “Go eat a sandwich“, even in a joking manner, only to find you thought it rather insulting because people really don’t know how much you’ve tried to gain weight but never have any luck. Or perhaps – you’re just built that way and happy with your size but find it very ignorant of them for saying such things without even asking you how you feel about your own weight – or why so skinny? in the first place.

Let’s not forget the Big Dolls and Gents. You are constantly bombarded with many of these same concepts. “You’re too fat! You need to lose weight!” maybe you’re just too big for that corset that should fit. People may be ignorant enough to think you are a slob, well that’s okay – because they don’t know you and they don’t know the half of it. Perhaps you’ve tried for years to lose weight now and all but given up.

Losing weight can be hella tough. I know because someone in my family has that same plight. If you stress, it can really slow down your progress in a day or night. Being made to feel horrible over your weight doesn’t help; if anything it makes it harder to feel motivated to lose that weight – although, there are some people motivated by negative-Nancys’ too. And sometimes, as much as we want to lose weight, we still slip and splurge anyway – eating what we love only to gain and remain the same.

It’s okay to splurge now and again, don’t fret. Keep your chin up. If you slip and mess up, try again tomorrow. Keep trying until it sticks! If you give up before you really try at all, then well – you just haven’t found the right motivation yet. If the weight doesn’t come off no matter what you do, try talking to your doctor, it could be a medical condition too. The same can be said for skinny people as well, in some cases.

Don’t feel bad or guilt yourself if you absolutely have to get Li-po (or some other form of weight-control surgery) to help give yourself a jump-start. Some people may have to if they have trouble and medical conditions that prevent them from losing in the first place. Never allow anyone or anything to make you feel less than your worth, I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you that, just look to your true friends and family for their two-cents.

Again, it is the Fashion Industry and the Media’s fault for perpetuating this nonsense about what ‘True Beauty‘ is to start. Recall with me that, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” and that the ideal of ‘Beauty‘ has changed from century to century. Just look at Betty Page and Marilyn Monroe, they set the standards in their time for being ‘Curvy’ to be acceptable and pretty (and they were very lovely ladies).

Audrey Hepburn is one of my favorite actresses. She was truly a classic beauty, simple, elegant and classy. Again, she help set a certain kind of standard as well. And back in the Middle Ages in Europe, being overweight meant you could provide and were wealthy.

1904224_606812629394179_173716281_n

This, not mine. Belongs to someone else. All rights reserved to them. I hope they don’t mind me using it.

Again, what’s most sad is that the Fashion Industry and Media have this, “One size fits all” or “One size fits most” mentality and think it’s okay to leave behind the folks who don’t fit into their very ‘narrow‘ view of ‘average‘ or what they consider ‘beauty’ to be. These are our major nit-picks. We may have our minor nit-picks too, such as not enough color choices; or that they make all evening gowns for girls who are far too tall to be considered average; or taking a great and beautiful design but not making it in enough sizes or colors; or sizes not being what they are or simply not enough size variety.

Whatever the minor nit-pick might be, whether it is, “They call that Burgundy?! Are they color blind?!” or otherwise, these pale in comparison to the real issues at hand. That folks like us just want to be recognized and treated the same like anyone else. Smaller ladies may not be able to find what they are looking for in their size in the Women’s section and may feel forced to visit the Kids or Teens sections. They end up having to choose size over style. After all, the Kids and Teen sections don’t always carry sexy bras that “full-grown” ladies can or might want to wear, let alone outfits that say, “I’m sassy, classy, intelligent and elegant – so beware”.

And while we could take our clothes to be altered, trimmed, hemmed or otherwise – that costs money and it may be an extra expense some people simply can’t afford. Some of us may try to attempt to do it ourselves, but without proper guidance and training, we might wind up doing something regrettable to a favored blouse or pair of pants.

Fashion Designers & Media are disrespecting those out there being hurt by these “Standards” they’ve set, not to mention an extra market they COULD be catering too as well that they are ultimately missing out on making money from. While I may not be a big fan of feeding major corporations, this just seems like a big issue and I’d think hard to miss. I’m surprised most companies haven’t noticed and tried to take advantage of this market in some way. I feel they’ve shot themselves in the foot possibly for YEARS because of this kind of drivel.

So, to all you Ladies and Gents or whatever you may be, dare to hang on to those dresses that still fit for just a bit longer, those T-shirts, Corsets, Jeans or whatever they may be, because I know how hard it is to find something in your size. When you do, it’s just so hard to part with it because you never know how lucky you’ll be the next shopping trip of the season. And when we do find something, it’s like the ‘Holy Grail‘ of our fashion-sense taste-buds.

1959955_694247507263179_1918710060_nRemember you are beautiful, wonderful, FANTASTICLY awesome and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. And as for the Fashion Standards and Media, remember it’s all FAKE anyway and/or Photoshopped unless it states otherwise. Fashion and Media should be held accountable for their crimes – their crimes against Humanity. I know that sounds a bit ‘dramatic‘ but when you think about it, in a way – it is their fault so many folks, young and old, have self-confidence, self-image and other psychological issues that impede their belief – that they are beautiful, just the way they are.

Shame on you Media! Shame on you Fashion! And also, shame on those who do nothing to help uplift you but rather put you down! Shame on you, shame on you all!

Thank you for reading and I hope this helped to uplift some spirits out there.

~Infinite love, blessings, gratitude and healing to (for those who need it ;) )~

Special Note: None of the pictures provided by this post are rightfully mine. Someone else made them and contributed them to the Internet community. All rights are respectfully reserved to those they rightfully belong to. I do not have ownership of any kind, I am simply exercising my freedom of speech and I certainly hope they don’t mind me using them in my post.

I’d love to give credit to whoever the images do belong to, so if you know who they are or they want to come forward, I’d be happy to make that edit and notation. Also, thank you for sharing these images and/or quotations, etc with all of us who surf the web.

Co-edited by – my partner. ;)

Videos You may wish to check out:

4 Ladies Get The ‘Cover Model’ Makeover Of Their Dreams … And Then Hate The Results

See Why We Have An Absolutely Ridiculous Standard Of Beauty In Just 37 Seconds

What Happens To Some Kids When They Go To Work In This Famous Industry Is Awful

Dove Real Beauty Sketches (extended)

Is Business to Blame for Social Negative Reinforcement?

English: Don Mueang Airport domestic terminal,...

English: Don Mueang Airport domestic terminal, near Bangkok, Thailand – Thai Airways customer service counters. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A dear friend of mine I met through SecondLife and I were sharing a conversation yesterday about our experiences in Retail. Especially those terribly “negative” experiences we have had in the retail environment. For those unfamiliar with the Retail market, it can be pretty cut-throat, unforgiving, unfair and sometimes – very unrewarding (especially sometimes with how the CUSTOMERS treat you). Course, it depends on the type of Retailer you are.

I tend to find Small Retail Businesses (Mom and Pop Stores) are better, friendlier, care about their employees (more often than not), appreciate them, believe in what they are selling and more. Course this isn’t true for EVERYONE I’m sure, but that’s been my experience.

However, during the conversation it sparked the idea for a possible Psychological aspect of Retail that goes unconsidered. Big Retailers often do specific things with their inventory (ex: Move sh*t around on you) that may annoy or irritate you, but the ploy that they are aiming for is to get you to spend more time than you’d like and tempt you to buy more than what you actually NEED. Some of you are probably going, “Well Duh!“, humor me – for those who don’t know. Thank you.

As I was saying, now while they have Psychological ploys like this to boost sales, my question is – are they thinking about some of the “Negative Reinforcement” they are helping to promote when it comes to society/their customer base? More

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones – But Words Can STILL Be Hurtful

We all heard this rhyme when we were children, “Sticks and Stone may break my bones but words can never hurt me,” but what people don’t realize is that some words, when we are beaten day in and day out with them on a routine basis, can eventually take on the weight of those “Sticks and Stones” in a metaphorical sense. And these wounds can hurt for years and leave deep lasting marks far worse than any broken bone or scratch that may eventually become a scar. Recently a video was shared with me by a friend on this very thing. It says what I, essentially, wanted to rant about better than I feel I could to do it proper justice of how it affects others.

I was a victim of bullying myself from the time I was 6 till I was a Freshmen in High School. I also dealt with heavy and serious suicidal depression (don’t worry, wasn’t so bad I made attempts on my life or anything but I felt like I wanted to die, that was it) from 6-1/2 to 12 years of age and even after – the healing process was a continuous thing to mend the damage done especially by others who didn’t understand me, my home life situation or what had happened to me. Each of us have our own stories, scars, memories and other things we share. We don’t always have the same experiences but for each one of us out there our experiences affect us far differently than it will for someone else on the outside looking in.

So here it is, the video. I’m not going to lie – I almost cried watching this. I wanted to – but the tears wouldn’t come. This video deserves the well deserved tears of truth on all the points it hits home with. It’s worth your time and watching. When you finish watching, please share it with others you know who will appreciate it and may find some comfort in its truthfulness. I feel everyone should see this and this should even be on the Jumbotron in Time Square, but only if we were so lucky. Thank you.

Bullies Called Him Pork Chop

Thank you for reading and watching the video. Until next time, be well and lots of love!

~Light and Dark Blessings – Namaste~

Are You or Are You Not? That is the Question – Priest/ess

English: Priestess of the Egyptian goddess Isi...

English: Priestess of the Egyptian goddess Isis, holding a situla (a bronze jug). Roman statue of the 2nd century AD, on display at the Museo Archaeologico Regionale, Palermo, Sicily. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A true musing of my mind for you today folks. If you get “scared” grab a Plushie to hold, squeeze and cuddle (or a pet). If you get confused, which may or may not happen because I’m going to try my best to be pretty clear and not jump around too much, please ask me to clarify my meaning in comments. Thank you.
This is dedicated to all the Priests, Priestesses and others of that nature of all paths, orders, traditions, faiths or whatever and wherever you may be.

As primarily a Solitary Priestess on her path it has not always been easy, as I am sure it has been much the same for others like myself. People don’t often understand the trials, struggles and tribulations we experiences. The hardships and ridicule we endure. We’ve done nothing wrong except be ourselves and pursue a path that “fits”, “makes sense”, a part of who we are we cannot fight that brings us great joy and happiness in following that path. Conversely, there is also much sadness, sorrow, worries, doubts and fears too.

In modern society most people expect that anything you can/could do in the world can be proven with a single piece of paper that supposedly “claims” you’ve done some kind of official study with someone, somewhere to achieve this new level of understanding or learning. This too goes the same for Priests and Priestesses. I can’t tell you how many times, because honestly I don’t remember, I’ve told someone, “I’m self-studied” or “I’m self-taught/trained” and immediately they’ve ceased all contact with me or they’ve completely mocked, berated, belittled and ridiculed me.

It hurts, it sucks but there isn’t much you can do about it, except have faith in yourself and that you are following the right path for YOU.

Too many people, as I hear, get discouraged by these sorts of things, but again – it’s like what I’ve heard many a good Christian say, “It’s a test of your Faith. A test of your Dedication. A test of your Endurance, perseverance and personal strength.” I actually and honestly believe that, to a fair degree. See, when you follow a path that is considered, “Reconstructionist” to me, in a way, anything goes or your Path, can be whatever it needs to be or wants to be so long as it runs in the same vein of what your initially trying to pursue as your actual path. More

Gun Control, Gun Control, GUN CONTROL! Your Favorite thing!

Caches of Tabuk 7.62 mm short assault rifles, ...

Caches of Tabuk 7.62 mm short assault rifles, Tabuk 7.62 mm assault rifles, and other rifles inventoried at the Iraqi Civil Defense (ICDC) armory in Al Shahabi, , during Operation IRAQI FREEDOM. Location: AL SHAHABI, AL ANBAR IRAQ (IRQ) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

For those whose heads I went over, the title is sarcasm. Remember it’s just one of the many other services I offer. ;)

I said I wasn’t going to do another story until I was up for it. Well apparently after watching Ferris Buellers Day Off (which I hadn’t seen until this morning) and eating some good food with Hot Chocolate, my mind was feeling pretty good. Good enough to try to coherently write something. Yay! Now I already wrote something some months back when the Aurora, CO Theater shooting happened. Now we’ve had another tragic incident and I can’t help but feel that perhaps the shooter of the Connecticut shooting got some ideas from the Shooter from the Aurora, CO shooting that helped to set some wheels in motion. I won’t say he’s the sole reason – but I wouldn’t be surprised if he helped to influence.

Some people are calling for stricter gun control laws. Some of course want Guns banned altogether. There are some good points such as – the people who are severely at risk for doing something stupid or are having some severe emotional disconnection or issues and have to take medication or see a doctor regularly should not be in control of assault rifles or any other kind of firearm. Why Assault Rifles are legal to buy – um – I don’t know about you but I’m confused on that point. Unless you are starting your own militia or arming yourself for the Zombie Apocalypse there is no reason for an Assault Rifle. More

United We Stand, Divided We Fall

This image was selected as a picture of the we...

This image was selected as a picture of the week on the Malay Wikipedia for the 1st week, 2010. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I know one of my readers (you know who you are) reported to me that 2012 has been one of the most profitable years despite the obvious Depression the United States and quite possibly the World has been under. I know there are still people out there desperate for jobs, food, a helpful and hopeful answer to the many questions that they may have regarding their fears, doubts and worries in these economic times. Those of you who remember your American History, if you remember anything about “The Great Depression“, probably remember sitting through movies or Documentaries depicting folks during “The Great Depression” in hovels (“Hoovervilles“), maybe in boarding home situations or other living conditions.

The American people, many of them, banded together to help one another out. Even if they didn’t like their living conditions or want things to be that way, they did what was necessary and humanely just for their fellow-man and it helped them to survive and get by. They shared their meals and what little they had with one another. Granted, there may have still been some crime during this time but I don’t remember hearing much about it. No; instead I heard stories of camaraderie and how the people demonstrated their distaste with President Herbert Hoover for not keeping to his word after making so many promises to the American People. More

Give Me That Ole Time Religion

Detail from The School of Athens by Raffaello ...

Detail from The School of Athens by Raffaello Sanzio, maybe an illustration of Hypatia (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey everybody! Gwen here again from beautiful Vancouver BC (Really is too, wish the weather was nice enough for pictures) with another fun and informal posting. Yesterday or the day before my “Man-friend” (like “lady-friend”) had me listen to one of his Podcasts called “British History”. He had me listening to a very special one and it inspired me to write this blog. Sorry for any spelling mistakes and the like typing, I’m typing with an iPads touch screen (keyboard wasn’t charged, typing one-handed, limited unfortunately on typing options).

If by the end of this you can figure out which podcast it was – kudos and brownie points for you, because I’m not telling. ;)

Today’s blog is obviously about “Reconstruction of old religions“. I am willing to tell you I am one of those people doing the same based on study of history, culture, lore & intuition (allowing my ancestors, heart, & soul to guide me). Now I’ve spoken with other Reconstructionists and unfortunately my experiences thus far have all been less than pleasant. In fact I have been insulted spiritually and the few I have met had this rather “Sexist” mentality. More

Holiday Cheer – The Downsides of Commercialization of Holidays

christmas 2007

christmas 2007 (Photo credit: paparutzi)

I know I’m not the only one who has noticed but it seems our favorite holidays start earlier and earlier. Sometimes that is grand!  Other times, to be quite frank, it’s getting on my nerves. Seriously. I remember when October rolled around they were already setting up Thanksgiving decorations, which is fine and understandable; they were also doing this the month prior, September, which is ALSO fine and gearing up for Christmas by clearing out the inventory in the Garden Center of the local Wal-mart. Toward around the end, Fall and Christmas were dominating the Halloween scene.

Which vex’ me a bit, but still not a big deal since I knew Thanksgiving was just around the corner and the fall stuff works with Halloween because it’s during our time for final Harvest.

No; my beef is when they play Christmas music in November and it’s before Thanksgiving. I don’t mind AFTER Thanksgiving but you play my holiday cheer music before Thanksgiving, all I want to do is find the Manager and tell them to turn it off and play the radio. I am so SICK and tired of my holidays not having much of a chance to say, “Hi! Hello! It’s me again. How are- HEY!” *holiday 1 gets shoved out by next holiday coming up* “Hello again! Remember me? I’m here too! What have-” *gets shoved out by holiday 3* “How you doin?! Long time no see!”, in short – this is exactly how it feels. More

P.A.U. 7 – End of…Heroes?

City Of Heroes: Delta Arietis

City Of Heroes: Delta Arietis (Photo credit: Psycho Al)

Hello to all my readers! Sorry you’ve experienced some serious “break-ups” between my posts. I seem terrible about trying to keep up with a weekly posting instead of a daily posting. I apologize for that. I wish I felt much more motivated to do my musings as of late, but ah me – that’s life.

There’s been much weighing on my heart and mind as of late and those take priority, sadly. You will be happy to know I’ve done some reading. I’m currently enjoying the rest of the Circle Trilogy (Morrigan’s Cross, The Dance, The Valley of Silence) by Nora Roberts. I have to say, I don’t think she’s a terrible author, but I haven’t been jivingon her style. It seems straight forward and normal enough, but I don’t know if someone edited these books before they went to publishing. I felt that at times I couldn’t tell who was talking as far as dialogue goes (had to re-read certain passages at times over again) at times and sometimes the writer’s voice was a touch choppy here and there and not understandable. More

YE-HA! Giddy-up! On the Campaign Trail!

English: Ballot Box showing preferential voting

English: Ballot Box showing preferential voting (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

As some of you may know it is preliminary voting season where we weed out the contenders from those who don’t stand a CHANCE against the rest of the competition. Normally I don’t LIKE getting involved with politics. I usually don’t want to talk about it unless there’s a good 10 foot POLE separating ME from IT. But this is a rather important thing to discuss, not so much the preliminary themselves but the candidates on the ballots.

Now this will be a reminder to some but to others this might be the wake-up call you need. I know it can FEEL overwhelming looking at all those names on the ballot. Some of the candidates on the ballot you will have seen, most likely, commercials for others you won’t have a CLUE as to WHO they are much less what views they have or what agenda they have. More

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